Tuesday, March 16, 2010

Bracketology- My Way

Well, well, if it isn't March Madness time. I find it extremely amusing how people....(mumbles under breath), get so pumped up around playoff time, doesn't seem to matter what the sport, when it comes down to the ultimate final battle and they seem to be propelled forward by the smell of the competition.

Now, I don't generally get all hyped up over the "big game" but let me put this into prospective for you, I am the only female in a house full of testosterone. And when my television viewing list includes, ESPN, ESPN2, ESPN College and an occasional smattering of Dirty Jobs, Pawn Stars and Myth Busters, I am bound to soak up some of the tournament frenzy. I also find myself interested in this particular round of games because  of the Kansas connections. Both my sons attend college at the University of Kansas, so I feel a bit of loyalty to the school that so happily takes all my money. Rock Chalk Jayhawk.

So when the brackets come out, and everyone sits down to fill theirs out, I find myself looking at it thinking, I know nothing, I cannot go by wins/losses, tough schedules, player on the injured list.....none of that, so how do I participate? I find a different method to pick my scientific method necessary. I have used various methods in the past and it always makes my family laugh ..........until I do well, then I'm the one laughing.....

I decided to totally mix it up this year, kind of a crazy quilt of selection hang on, the random circles of thinking may very well cause bouts of vertigo.

Round 1- Mascot Bracketology
I base this mainly on which mascot could either, A) eat the other one,  B) is just not a stupid thing for a mascot or C) my own personal preference......because I can, that's why.
Midwest -
Jayhawks-Mountain Hawks.......Duh, fictional character trumps real life every time, I mean how can you defeat something that doesn't exist?
Running Rebels-Panthers-seriously? 
Spartans-Aggies- Spartans....because it makes me think of Will Farrell from Saturday Night Live.
Terrapins-Cougars- now, most people would choose the Cougars because of their ferocity but I've been bitten by a turtle and I'm thinking they are a dark horse among mascots.
Volunteers-Aztecs- Think about it.......this land functions because of volunteers, enough said.
Hoyas-Bobcats- Hoya?.....really? I vote for them simply because the name alone should make them want to fight.
Cowboys-Yellow Jackets-one word, sqoosh.
Buckeyes-Gauchos- I'm pretty sure this line of logic would lead me to the Gauchos, since a buckeye is basically a tree seed, however gaucho makes me think of a drunk cowboy and I'm thinking a well placed tree seed could cause them to choke.

Orangemen-Catmounts- Fictional.......remember?
Bulldogs-Seminoles- Well placed problem
Bulldogs-Miners- Miners? like on Snow White, Hi Ho, Hi Ho it's off the bracket you go.......
Commodores-Racers-this one was tough, but then I saw that Murray State has a competitive Rifle Shooting Team, so they win.
Musketeers-Gophers-gophers look like giant rats......
Panthers-Golden Grizzlies- golden grizzly? sounds like a vegas act.......rawr......I pick the panthers.
Cougars-Gators-no question
Wildcats-Eagles-cats eat birds

Wildcats-Tigers (and bears oh, my!) - sorry my Kansas is showing......toss up
Longhorns-Demon Deacons- Demon deacon? contridiction in terms, they lose
Owls-Big Red- I looked it up a bear of some sort.......probably with cinnamony breath
Badgers-Terriers-we don't need no stinking badgers........but terriers? woof, woof, no way.
Golden Eagles-Huskies-Huskies.....made me think of the chubby little boy in the 6th grade.....always felt sorry for him
Lobos-Grizzlies-sharp teeth to the fleshy neck area
Tigers-Tigers- hmmm, what does one do? pick the more manly of the tiger depiction (and as a KU fan it pains me but.....Missouri)
Mountaineers-Bears- I'm thinking a pick axe to the forehead.

Blue Devils-Eagles- once again fictional prevails
Bears-Cardinals- birds, not just for breakfast anymore
Aggies-Aggies- this was another tough one......they both sound retarded......... but let's go with Texas at least they have the word Agricultural in their name.
Boilermakers-Saints- a train will do serious damage when coming into contact with a saint.
Fighting Irish-Monarchs- sorry, can't quit picturing a drunk leprechaun......
Bears-Bearkats-ok, history tells me the early sport teams were called "The Normals"
Spiders-Gaels-seriously, are they going to dance on the spiders?
Wildcats-Colonials- you get a wildcat going and he is going to rip that powdered wig off and it won't be a pretty sight.

Round 2- Team Color Bracketology
Basically this round was picked on pretty colors........I am not fond of the color orange, so if you were a predominantly orange team.......done..........and I like blue, so if you had are in..........if neither of those determining factors were present, I picked the prettiest colors in the logo......
So it all shook out like this:
Ohio State
Florida State
Kansas State
W. Virginia
Texas A&M

Round 3- this round was picked by my son when I would thrown out the teams I had in my bracket. What he had to choose from only caused him to shake his head at me a couple of times.

Kansas State
W. Virginia
Texas A&M

Round 4- Coaches Age Bracketology - youngest coach
Bill Self/40-John Thompson III/43
Todd Lickliter/55-Frank Martin/43
Bo Ryan/62-Bob Huggins/56
Mark Turgeon/44-Scott Drew/39

Round 5- Kansas Connection Bracketology- the team must have some connection to Kansas, because I said so.
Kansas University
Kansas State University
W. Virginia (used to coach at Kansas State)
Baylor -  Scott Drews born in Kansas City  (although Mark Turgeon coached in Kansas, I like Baylor Better)

Championship- Totally gut Bracketology
Kansas vs. Baylor

and of course, my jayhawks for the title


Pat Willems said...


countryduck said...

This is hilarious. I would have laughed out loud when I read it if I weren't in a staff meeting. I think your method is just as valid as others I've seen.