Monday, March 28, 2011

10 Things Women Do That Men Don't Understand (a counterpost)

Well, the backlash from the previous post about what women don't understand about men was fairly minimal but I did hear murmurings around the office. I think it was quiet murmurings and not boisterous confrontation because they thought we women would try to justify every issue they mentioned, (and yes, for the record, we did try). But I know we females are complex creatures and the simple mind cannot understand the labyrinth through which we operate. But in all fairness I will put voice to their confusion. I will also refrain from exposing what female attribute they claim seems to have the power over men - I will, however say the brain was never mentioned.... you figure it out.

I will also try and not to give my own commentary - wait a minute- this is MY blog, I can spin this any direction I buckle up, here we go!

10 Things Women Do That Men Don't Understand (in no particular order) The woman's explanation is in pink.
1.  New Outfits. Particularly why a new outfit is needed for any kind of event, even if the people there have never even seen ANY of our outfits. Because we need/want to feel our best and a new outfit sends endorphins to our brains to give us super's scientifically based, look it up.

2.   Why they don't like explosions. They said this and then laughed maniacally.And........I got nothing, blowing stuff up,..........truly makes no sense to me.
3.   The appeal of shoes. No explanation needed. Really? a man that has every gadget in the known universe and you are going to complain about a truly important piece of protective clothing? Even Barbie knew shoes were important, ever see a Barbie whose shoes were missing? The poor girl has holes in the bottoms of her feet.

4.   The obsession about the toilet seat. Up? Down? whose responsibility is it? Well, seeing that the seat needs to be down 75% of the time then the default answer should be down....what can I say? Numbers don't lie.
5.   Not wanting the man to solve our problems. Why when a woman is telling a man about her problems, she doesn't want him to FIX it, just listen. Seriously, how hard is this concept men? At birth you were issued two ears and one mouth, just LISTEN, most times we have it all figured out by the end of the rant anyway.

6.   Why women go to the bathroom in packs. Duh, it's in case we need help from falling in after some inconsiderate man has left the seat up.
7.   Why it takes women so long to get ready. Smiles.....because we have so many choices of shoes from which to pick, and just an fyi - if we ask which ones look best, more often than not you will be wrong.
8.    Asking a man to do a chore and then redoing it when he's finished. I'm just zipping my lip on this one.
9.    Equal Rights. In the sense that women want equal pay, equal recognition but still expect the guy to pay for things when out on a date. We don't expect it all the time, but maybe the first few times out it would be nice, and by the way, a few text conversations or watching you have a marathon xbox gaming session, does NOT count as a night out......just sayin'

10.  How women can go shopping for hours and not buy anything. It all goes back to equal pay, we just go to dream and plan for that first date when you are willing to buy us something, we need to have a plan. And we will probably mention all the nifty things we saw that we liked, but did not buy, hint: make note of them for later use.
(and a few more for good measure)
11.  Why do women say not to buy them a gift and then get upset when you don't. Because deep down we know you love us so much you would WANT to buy us something, and we have a list of things we've probably mentioned. (see item 10)
12.  Why does a woman always think she's right even when you can prove she's not. Because the facts may be in dispute at the moment, but at some point the facts may change and she will be ready to point them out.
13.  Why a vacation has to be packed with things to do and not just for relaxing. Because you may never, ever have this opportunity again and you need to take advantage of it.


The adventures of Lilibet said...

Hi, where did you find the shoes image? It's lovely.

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